This Morning’s political and social affairs correspondent has bravely waived her proper to anonymity to share her harrowing story.
Ashley James on the Day by day Mirror 2025 Delight of Britain Awards on the Grosvenor Home Resort, London on Monday twentieth October 2025 (Picture: Adam Gerrard / Day by day Mirror)
This Morning’s political and social affairs correspondent, Ashley James, rose to fame in 2012 on E4 actuality present Made in Chelsea, regardless of hailing from Northumberland, and intriguingly titled her new ebook Bimbo – though she is each clever and profitable.
With a 2:1 diploma in English and French literature, she recurrently challenges Piers Morgan and Nick Ferrari on the ITV daytime present and lately appeared on Superstar Mastermind. Like Girl Constance Lytton – the nineteenth century suffragette who was her chosen topic (scoring 8 with no passes) – she can also be an activist. Now, she is courageously waiving her proper to anonymity, as a sufferer of rape, to advocate for improved help for victims of sexual assault and to “change the dialog” about rape. She confided in an interview to The Mirror: “Whereas at college, I used to be raped. It is one thing I’ve by no means spoken about, and but I’ve thought of it day by day since – more and more so since having youngsters It is one of many very worst moments of my life.” Ashley, 38, who was 21 when the assault occurred, continued: “It was vastly traumatic. I am not telling the story to shock, however as a mirror to indicate how widespread these experiences are, and in addition how damaged the help system is.”
Ashley bravely opened up on her harrowing ordeal (Picture: Instagram/@ashleylouisejames)
In accordance with the Workplace for Nationwide Statistics, 83-90% of feminine victims, like Ashley, are sexually assaulted by somebody they know. ONS information additionally reveals that 86% of sexual assault victims are ladies – a determine that will increase to 91% in cases of rape.
Ashley, who has chosen to not disclose her attacker’s id, emphasises that she now recognises she was not at fault. She said: “It wasn’t my fault. Sure I used to be drunk, sure I used to be in going out garments. Nevertheless it wasn’t my fault. I do know that now. As a tradition and as a society, we nonetheless very a lot sufferer blame. We educate ladies how to not be raped, as a substitute of educating males how to not rape. Males can cease raping us.
“Due to the disgrace, taboo and stigma, folks nonetheless assume these [men who rape] are unhealthy apples, or strangers in alleyways, and it is not the case. We have to acknowledge it and inform our daughters to cease modifying their behaviour; cease questioning what individuals are sporting – we have to change the dialog.”
Ashley, who shares two youngsters, Ada, who turns three in March, and Alfie, 5, along with her accomplice of six years, Metropolis employee Tommy Andrews, didn’t report her rape. She admits: “I did not come ahead. Not as a result of I assumed the police would not imagine me, however as a result of the person wasn’t a stranger in a darkish alley. He was a good friend. Due to that, the one individual I blamed was myself … for years. Even now I discover it laborious to think about him as a rapist. However I used to be actually unconscious.”
Her motivation to return ahead stemmed from Gisèle Pelicot, the sufferer on the coronary heart of France’s largest rape trial. Her husband Dominique Pelicot, 73, acquired a 20-year jail sentence after being convicted of drugging her and enlisting 50 different males to rape her over a decade.
Gisèle waived her proper to anonymity to publicly attend the trial and mentioned of rape victims: “It is not for us to have disgrace – it is for them.”
Ashley explains: “She turned up each single day along with her head held excessive and mentioned ‘the disgrace wants to vary sides’. If something ever occurred to my daughter, I might by no means need her to stay with the disgrace and silence that I felt that I’ve lived with. Sexual assault is an space the place there’s nonetheless a number of disgrace and taboo. The system nonetheless would not help ladies. It nearly appears like the lady is placed on trial greater than the person who’s accused of rape.”
Ashley and her household (Picture: Instagram/ashleylouisejames/)
Ashley additionally highlighted the challenges dealing with youngsters with particular instructional wants (SEN) – having revealed to her 688,000 Instagram followers final 12 months that Alfie was present process a SEN evaluation. Additionally a DJ, podcast host and parenting commentator, she practically misplaced him throughout childbirth.
She defined: “He got here out blue. They have been fearful about Alfie. It wasn’t an excellent beginning, it was very traumatic, and he is nonetheless having to have a number of osteo [osteopathy] to assist him.”
Discussing his SEN evaluation, she elaborated: “I think it is autism, however it’s too quickly for an official prognosis. The varsity has been wonderful at working with him reasonably than towards him. I really feel actually grateful that we stay in a time the place it is acknowledged and brought severely. He is very excessive functioning and I like the way in which his mind works. He’s wonderful. Some youngsters course of issues in another way to others – they are not being naughty or impolite. If we have been extra accepting of the methods completely different minds function it will be a greater world.”
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His SEN evaluation has additionally supplied Ashley with perception into why early parenthood proved difficult – one thing she speaks overtly about. She defined: “My psychological well being declined as a result of I felt like – ‘is that this my life now’ In case your profession is a giant a part of your id, otherwise you journey, you then’re instantly stripped away from all of that and also you’re supposed to search out fulfilment within the monotony of doing the identical factor day by day.”
Bimbo: Ditch the Labels, Discover Your Voice, Reclaim Your Confidence by Ashley James (£22, Century) is out on Feb 12.
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